H to the UM to the I-L-I-T-Y

Stubborn : Middle english (originally in the sense of ‘untamable, impacable’) and of unknown origin. Having or showing determination not to change ones views even in the presence of good argument or reason.

I have learned over my years, how to forge and remain confident in a path all my own. This is my advantage. Through this, I have also become righteous in my ideas of what is best. This is my fault. I am aware, and that is a step forward. Still, acting outside of my habit proves to be difficult. I am my closest friend and my own worse energy; the planter and pest.

What I love about Hip Hop culture is that anybody can catch you, and nobody is off limits. You don’t get ready, you stay ready. An experience in the circle today, can be equally as empowering as it was embarrassing the day before. Reasonable constructive feedback I receive from those I look up too stay stuck in my head, yet I feel resistant to the words. Sometimes, I am simply a rebel without a cause, a tiresome counter argument. There was plenty of this boisterous energy in my family dynamic when I was growing up. So, I have to ask myself; what I am perpetuating? What am I holding onto? How am I sabotaging my potential?

Today, I became student to a couple of talented, hard working humans who are about a decade younger than me. I teach, so I already posses a genuine fascination for the younger generation and what they can offer the world. I believe that curiosity is something that the older generations lack. In addition, I know my generation doesn’t listen nearly as much as we should. I question if it is anyone’s duty to listen? How do we decide? Is it our right as artists to create? Or do we earn it? Where do we decide what is worth studying, and what can be learned by experiencing?
Interact with young people and watch how they lead intuitively, they share because they want to share. They are not yet distracted by the rolling abyss of “what will I get out of this.”

A slice of humble pie that I have been hungry for.
Defeated (literally). Grateful. Motivated to be better.

“I can see you thinking”
It’s simple really.

Work harder. (hint; spend more time)


Published by Evar After


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